There comes a point in life when one stops, takes stock and seriously asks oneself - perhaps for the first time "What on earth is going on with me and everything else?"
For years, our little sponge brains soak up most of what is thrown at us, rejecting only that which is ugly, smelly or doesn't taste or feel nice - until one day we stop and ask ourselves who we really are, what we think we're doing, and most importantly "Why?"
On examination we find that we do an awful lot of things automatically - many without understanding the reason, but we do them anyway. Then we discover that there's a word that describes these patterns - habits. And boy, do we have plenty of them, some really quite useful, and others a combination of useless, crazy and quite dangerous. So why then?
Habits have evolved over millions of years as a unique service to man and beast enabling us to repeat actions that we have already made a few times, without having to consciously think about them each time. Skills are therefore entirely reliant on habits - without habits it would be extremely difficult if not impossible to develop a skill (like driving for example).
The gamble in introducing habits to the behavioural realm was that bad ones could outweigh good ones thus resulting in the extermination of all living things - but so far so good, exactly the opposite has happened (well, until recently anyhow).
If you think I'm joking, ask yourself why SAFA is spending so much money on a world class football coach? It's quite simple really, how much longer do you think supporters will keep turning out to watch a team of flashy indivuduals who keep losing to Lesotho and Botswana? Not much longer, I agree - the losing habit needs to be turned around and there's less than three years to do it.
Habits are the reason well-to-do folk spend huge sums of money sending their children to private schools - hopefully to develop the right ones. Habits along with our deep sense to belong, are the reasons why gangs emerge in poor neighbourhoods. We get into the habit of doing just about everything we do, whether good or bad. We're also quite good at defending our habits, particularly the bad ones.
The bad ones. What happens then, when we acknowledge to ourselves that the bad ones are harming us and those who rely on us - something that relatively few people seem capable of doing?
Why is it that we need a world renowned nutritionist (Patrick Holford) to come here and tell us that for the past century we've been filling our children's lunch boxes with trash and that if we give them more water, fatty acids and a bit of protein, less sugar and white bread, their IQ's and attitudes would improve dramatically? (Sunday Times 18 February, page 8)
The key is in the way we exercise our free will. It is the ability to understand habits, instincts and urges for what they are - to realise that we can, at any time we choose, take control of what we eat, what habits we allow, how we behave, who and what we are. And it's just a decision away - for anyone.
You are not your Mom or Dad. You received things from them - but you are now you. As you mature you inherit the right to make your own decisions about who you are and who you will be. This is the enormous benefit of free will, of being able to choose who you will become - of being able to change your mindset.
Paul du Toit, Mindset Shifter.
